MRI – Humble Dave

This isn’t some mushy blog post about how being nice to people makes you feel good (it does, btw). It also isn’t some philosophical mumbo-jumbo about the nature of the Universe. This is about complete and total self-interest, that also happens to help other people. Being nice offers real, tangible benefits for you, as well as intangible benefits for others. But since this post is about complete and total self-interest, we’re going to ignore the benefits to others (for now. But really, if you’ve read any of my other blog posts you know that my style tends to be a bit…bouncy. Just because I start somewhere doesn’t mean I end up where we’d expect).

So what the heck am I talking about, and how could being nice help me? Tangibly (Huh. I wasn’t entirely sure that was a word. I’m always pleasantly surprised when an uncertain word comes back without the “red line” beneath it. Today is going to be a good day! Where was I? Right. Tangibly.). I need an MRI for my neck (why?), and scheduling of such a thing can take weeks and weeks. Now, “weeks” when you’re in pain is a long time. I don’t want to wait weeks. So I call on Tuesday and talk to the scheduler (Carrie). I am super nice and upbeat. Cheery, even. I schmoozed her. But I’ve got to be honest: Carrie was awesome. Sure, she started out gruff and all professional. The old “Let’s get this done, I have a million other patients to deal with” attitude. Can’t blame her! I was on hold for 10 minutes waiting for help. They’re ALWAYS busy. But in the face of my cheery self she loosens up and finds me a date of March 1st. No, sorry, there’s no cancellation list where they’ll call you if someone else cancels. I should call back every morning to check. No problem, Carrie, thanks so much for your help! Seriously, a week and a half isn’t too bad! Not what I wanted, but C’est la vie.

And that’s where the benefits start kicking in. Because you know what? People WANT to help people who make them feel good. Because that ALSO feels good (yup, already made the first sentence of this post into a lie. Deal with it.). So anyway, Carrie says, “You know what? I’ll keep your name and number next to me here for the rest of the day and if someone cancels I’ll give you a call.” Carrie’s the best. We hang up and frankly, I’m not expecting any calls. Come on, she’s busy!

About 15 minutes later my phone rings. It’s Carrie, laughing because literally the call right after mine was a cancellation, and do I want to come in on the 27th. Heck yeah I do! Lots of thanks and emphasis that she is appreciated. Boom, I’m in 2 days earlier (remember, when you’re in pain every day is an eternity. So technically, I’m 2 eternities better off!). Life is good! Also, she’s feeling great because her normally “standard” day is suddenly just a tiny bit different, and better. I could hear the smile on her face. It felt great.

Anyway, I’m going about my business when about an hour later my phone rings again. It’s Carrie! HI CARRIE! She just had another cancellation and do I want it? It’s for the 22nd, this Thursday (now today, as I’m writing this). HECK YEAH I WANT IT! THANKS CARRIE; YOU’RE THE BEST! Bi-directional happiness ensues.

So what did we learn? Being nice to people has tangible benefits. I get my MRI a full week earlier, which means I can make my neurosurgery appointment earlier. Which means we can solve my neck problems sooner. Which would be so awesome. So, so awesome.

And this isn’t my only story. These go on and on. In another soon-to-be- written post you’ll read about how being nice via email to customer service reps can help fix your gross stupidity in letting airline ticket vouchers expire a month before you tried to use them (Sorry Dad. You were right, I was wrong. You’re smart, and I’m dumb. You’re very good looking, and I’m not good looking at all. Fortunately, we’re all good now!).

I know some people are reading this and saying, “He’s only faking being nice to get something.” To that I respond: That’s not true. I’m a nice person most of the time. But regardless, IT DOESN’T MATTER. If you act nice, you are nice. Nobody knows what’s in your head. You could be thinking about horrible, terrible things. Nobody is affected by what’s in your head; people only know you by the actions you take. BE NICE. If you won’t listen to me, listen to the late, great, Patrick Swayze.

How will you know when it’s time to not be nice? You won’t, Dalton will tell you. Also, if you don’t know this quote, then go watch Roadhouse. That movie is amazing. But seriously, just be nice all the time. My mom has similar wisdom, “Kill them with kindness.” Be nice.

Thanks for reading! And since you’re all awesome, I know you’ll share that awesomeness with everyone else (see what I did there? I was nice, and now you want to tell people about my blog! Seriously, tell people about my blog.).

Living the Dream,
Humble Dave

As my wife will attest, I have a habit, nay, a gift, for injuring myself in stupid ways. Blew out my knee paddle-boating, 2nd degree burns on my hand from steam coming out of a lobster pot, minor neck injury from staying in the same position too long playing video games, etc. I mean, come on. I’m the guy who can hurt himself sleeping (not joking, keep reading).

Normally these are minor, relatively quickly healed injuries (the knee’s been an issue, but that’s a topic for another post. This is obviously about a NECK. Pay attention). Unfortunately, that’s not always the case.

In July of 2017 we took our strong and excitable puppy to Petco Park for a big dog event. We got to march on the ballfield; it was awesome! At one point I’m talking to someone and pupper sees a dog he wants to go play with and BAM, he’s off like a shot. I’m holding the leash firmly so he gets to the end of 6′ and snaps to a halt. But, not before all 60 lbs of his momentum rebounds right into my neck. I thought nothing of it at the time…

Next day, neck and arm hurt a bit. No big deal. Go to July 4th party.

Day after that, neck and arm hurt a bit more. No big deal. Go on long mountainous hike.

Ouch Day. Excruciating pain in my neck, radiating down my left arm into my fingertips. Yup, I think I’m broken.

Have you ever had neck pain? It’s remarkable how many things you do in your normal course of life which rely on your neck muscles in some way. Even just sitting in the car while someone else drives, your neck is constantly working to stabilize your head. Incredible.

I went to a few doctors, had x-rays and an MRI. I don’t remember all the technical terms,but the cervical disc between C5 and C6 in my neck is compressed and bulging out the sides of my spine. This bulge has caused a narrowing of the tunnels my nerves use to leave the spine and visit the rest of my body, hence the pain my in shoulder, arm, and hand. You know how Doctors always ask your pain level on a scale of 1-10*? I was spending most of my time at a 6, and tapped a 9 once or twice.

Per the Doctor, I have three options:

Medications, rest, and physical therapy. Based on what they saw in the scans this was considered the best, and least invasive option. The downside is that it would take the longest.
Cortisone shot in my neck which would hopefully reduce the swelling and fix the disc (I guess?). The downside is that if my blood didn’t clot fast enough and it bled into my spinal column, paralysis from the neck down. That didn’t sound like fun.
Surgery! They can take out the bad disc and put in an artificial one. Downside: Surgery. I really didn’t even consider this as an option at the time, and didn’t pursue any of the details.

So anyway, July, August, and September involved me sitting on the couch unable to do much of anything. I went to a painful PT (physical therapy) session 1-2 times/week. Periodic doctors appointments. That’s it. It was just awful. Missed an incredible family vacation. Missed months of dog walks and good training with my new pup. I took pills, slept, watched movies, read, PT, slept, and took more pills. Ad nauseum.

Started to feel a bit better around October, and by November I was able to walk him again, albeit carefully. I was being weaned off the many medications I was taking. There was a light at the end of the tunnel.

Sometime in January while on a walk he saw some crows that were talking smack and decided to give chase. Caught me off guard and boom, gave the old neck a shock. It hurt, and had clearly done some damage, but not terrible. If I was careful, it would be okay.

We focused on “heel” and loose leash training from here out. Keeping my by our side on walks instead of letting him have the full leash to roam. It was working great!

One quiet night I’m sound asleep when I hear Cody’s ALERT BARKBARKBARKBARK! I jerk awake, sitting up quickly, and promptly wrench my neck completely out of wack. I knew immediately this was going to be trouble. Yup, hurt myself safe and sound in my own bed. Woke up the next morning with the neck hurting worse, some pain in arm. Got even worse over the next few days.

So here I am, nearly right back where I started. I’m sitting on the couch in light pain (it’s usually better in the mornings) while the wife walks the dog. I have a doctor appointment and PT scheduled. And of course loads of meds. I don’t have the patience to go through another 3 months of slow healing only to re-injure myself again, so I’m going to explore the other options in more detail and see what I can do.

So, I guess the only advice I’ll pass along here is when you’re going to the gym, don’t skip neck day.

Living the Dream?

Humble Dave

*The Doctor’s 1-10 Pain Scale, level details by Dave:
10 – Pain so bad I passed out
9 – I’m fetal on the ground crying and helpless
8 – Pain is all-encompassing. Only thoughts in head are how to make it stop
5-7 – OMG this hurts in varying degrees. Doctor visit mandatory if doesn’t stop
3-4 – Pain bad enough that I’ll probably see a doctor if it doesn’t go away in a few days
1-2 – That’s annoying. Rub some dirt on it and walk it off.

Tag: MRI

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